Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Loving Other Peoples Blogs Right Now and a Update on Cameragate

So I am loving others writings of late. I find myself lying in my old room ( since moving back to Canada and living with mum I have reconnected with my youth. I am in my old room with the same smiley face light fixture and the same scary window that I thought owls hung around as a child ready to snatch me ...I was a melodramatic child) till late in the night 'trolling' the blog world.
There is something strangely appealing and intriguing about reading about others lives and trials. There is something educating and amazing about it.
Admittedly it makes me extremely jealous that I am such a crap writer. But even more importantly it proves to me that I am not the only average person in some bedroom writing about... well any old crap.
I seem to have a continious stream of thought and when I write on my blog it is exactly what is running through my brain at that point and onto the key pad ( hence the shit spelling and the never ending sentences) I have noticed I am not the only one to do this and it rocks people !!

So anyway there are a few blogs that I read everyday , some what stalker like ( sorry ). It gets bad as when they do not post for a bit I start thinking ' god damn write something for christsakes !'
http://www.suburbanmum.com/ is a regular for me. I just love the way she writes. It is too a never ending stream of thoughts. Plus her site is whickedly set up and I always love visiting it ( I get jealous when I look at Suburban mums site ! )
http://www.dooce.com/ if you do not know about Heather Armstrong and the Armstrong clan then you have been living in a shack under a rock in siberia. I can only highly reccomend you get over there and read her. She has the ability to make everything so fucking funny people. Personal favorites are when she posts the various amounts of hate mail from readers. The most recent from a hate mailer named ' Catherine' caused sheer outcry including 3 comments from myself. She is whicked and part of the reason why I love blogging.
http://www.wittydomainname.com/index.html Lisa is sooooo coool. No one writes about their pregnancy like she does. The ticker on baby blog is worth it alone for the weekly countdown to birth and the new comments under it each week sample of comments such as the following: Mommy's glad her morning sickness is subsiding. Just wait till she sees the stretch marks and varicose veins I've got coming for her !! I'm 20 weeks and 3 days old, only 137 days to go !

So these are the mommy ones. I have no idea why I like the mommy ones so much considering I want nothing to do with the life suckers I call children but I do there is something extremely funny about what they write about. They have all written things that have made me laugh cringe and even cry like a year old. They know how to write and it is cool!
I will list others that I read in a next post.

Now update on camera gate. I have yet more great pics on mums digital camera. Being Scottish from my Dad we went the the 15th Med companies Mess dinner for Robbie Burns night on Saturday. I was looookkkinn FINE !! black ball gown hair down slap on and heels. I have pics to prove. I still have no usb cable !! Her safe hiding place has yet to reveal its self. I went to the camera store to buy a new one...... NOT POSSIBLE ! she has a odd ball camera and the cable has to be ordered direct from the camera makers. This of course blows dead goats big style. So the plan is to rip the house apart and find the fucker
Future updates to flow
Lou x
( yeah yeah yeah my spelling is terrible so do not bother telling me I already know :-)

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

And He leads One of the Super Powers of the Free World

Can George W Bush ( or knobhead as I prefer to call him or Giant Ass Monkey ) make it through one speech and pronounce all his words correctly ??

Do you think he actually knows what half the worlds he is saying means ? Highly unlikely

The word is Nuclear pronounced : N-U-C-L-E-A-R



You are a Ass wipe buddy !

I also have a theory that GW is in the early onset of dimensia. He always has that look of deer in the headlights
The look of :
' where the hell am I ? Who am I ? What am I supposed to be saying and talking about ?'

Seriously you watch him closely next time (yes I know that may be hard to do for some) and you will see what I mean
Next thing we know this guy will be drooling and wetting his pants

Monday, January 22, 2007

Good Things on This side of The Pond

Well I am happy to report that some things on this side of the pond are just as good if not better then on th England side ( sorry England)

Firstly Clinique is cheaper way way cheaper!!! I just want to buy the whole damn place out every time I walk by it.
For example I bought my face wash for a cheap 20 bucks the other day. In the UK that would have cost me like almost 16 pounds !! so basically 40 bucks. Plus they have bonus time way more regularly over here then there. You only have to buy 25 bucks worth of stuff then you get all the bonus goodies. In the UK you have to buy at least 2 items to get the goodies. This normally averaged out at a cost of like 40 quid which is a lot of damn money in my books.
Note: Sorry boys who read this I do realise this is most likely inane female chatter but the girls will all know what the hell I am on about ok
Now just as a bit of info. If you want to buy good face wash and evn better skin cream this is what you need to buy NOW :

I used to use the bar of soap which is just as good but this is asier to use and it seems to last for freaking ever as well. Your skin feels clean it just feels damn clean !

I used the gel version shown here in the UK because the UK is no where near as dry as here. It is so light weight and works majic on your skin. Now that I am in Canada and it is the virtual artic tundra that it is I am now using the cream as my skin is soooo dry.

So thats the first thing that is so good about here everything is cheap.

Secondly :
IKEA ! My big blue and yellow mecca. I have professed my love of the swedish haven before but I love it even more now. I had to go there today for mum and can safely say it is even cheaper here! I know people hate it and I know that you have to build your own shit but come on people the swedish furniture kings started a whole new generation of furniture buyers when they created that place. It is my age demographic they were aiming for and lets be honest they did and are doing a damn good job.
I have ear marked every piece of furniture I want when I actually buy my own place ( the plan is summer/fall this year) I cannot wait. I have picked up the ikea big book and I am ready to roll big time

So there you go good things in the frozen north do exist ( not so frozen going up to plus 8 on Thursday HA Art see its not always cold here. Granted I can't exactly go to the lake in a swimsuit but its warm at least)

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

For Art

Yes I am still alive :-)

Apologies to all for not writing been a wee bit busy and just never seems to be enough time in the damn day at present.

I am highly pissed off at the fact that I still cannot find the cable lead for the camera and now on top of that the cell phone charger has gone walkies as well in one of mum s 'safe' places. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Right so I have been skiing!!! YAAAAAA! I was terrified. The week leading up to going consisted of me having visuals of breaking my legs.
Do not get me wrong I can ski and I can ski well. I have been doing it since the age of roughly 3. My parents would put me and my siblings between their legs and poles in front for us to hang on to and then push us ( sometimes with force) down the hil ( this was before the time of those handy rein leash thingys they have now)
But the problem was that I have not skied in almost 6 years ! Mum kept saying ' ah don't worry kid it is just like riding a bike' YEAH RIGHT easy for you to say mother.
I have not used the news skis out on the market, the fatter shorter ones, I am used to straight long ones. Well let me tell you the new ski's freakin rock !!!!!

It was like riding a bike god dammit ! By the end of the first day I was cruisin my newly canadianed ass off. By the second I was lighting a fag as I loaded on the chair lift ( this takes skill people trust me) and I went into the ' park' and went of a jump, granted it was a feeble attempt but it was a jump all the same. I did feel slightly stilted when little bro George popped off a jump and did a 360. His buddy Alan, on snowboard, popped off and did a load of grabs, but still I rocked ( bear in mind George used to work on the hills as a lifty and the like so he is amazingly good. I refused to go cliff jumping with him and the boys . Even I know my limits people)

So all in all it was wicked. The conditions are the best I have ever known them to be with a base of snow just shy of 300cm and a average snow fall of like 5cm a night what more can you ask for?!
The weather was good. Was oinly minus 8 or so no wind and sun. Plus the slopes were dea. No one was there. They all got scared off when it went down to minus 28 during the week in Alberta but forgot that Marmot basin has a serious inversion going on. So while it may be minus 20 down int he town of jasper it is minus 8 up in the hills on Marmot.

So I do have pics I will post them I will kill mum for 'safely' hiding the cable.

P.S If you ever want to experince the best skiing of your life and fairly cheap go here I promise you will fall in love http://www.skimarmot.com/ . There are so many Americans, Europeans and most of all Brits there now due to the amazing prices condition and staff
Marmot Rocks People !

Thursday, January 04, 2007

My First Sentence

I was reading one of my regular blog friends entries, http://www.suburbanmum.com/, and she told of her sons new words and more importantly new sentences ( sooooo cute ya could just eat him up ! ) Well it got me thinking about my first complete sentence and well needless to say it was to form the rest of my adult speech life and the fact that I am a potty mouth. So here it is for all and sundry :

I have no idea what my first word was but it was likely the usual thing like ' mum' 'dad' or even possibly ' food ' in fact food is likely what it was knowing myself like it do !

But my first sentence was a whole different ball game. I do personally think that it was a great moment in my life.

When I was little my mum and dad used to sit my high chair facing the deck and back garden in front of the sliding glass doors. I apparently loved sitting there while eating my various amounts of baby mush ( see possible first words above ....Food) .

We had a 2 dogs Annie and Bandit, they were Springer spaniels and well STUPID !! Stupid as shit. They used to sit outside that glass sliding door in minus 20 odd weather and sctratch at the door. Now these dogs had the most amazing dog house. It had huge amounts of bales of hay surrounding it effectively turning it into a giant heated home. Yet they still sat outside that door and whine and scratch. Dad used to stand at that door and mutter to himself and to the dogs as I sat and ate my baby mush.
Then the fateful day came. The usual routine came. Me. High Chair. Mush. Dad. Dogs. Mumbling. Then the routine broke with this fateful sentence that I decided to repeat after hearing dad:

' Those fucking stupid dogs !! ' It was said with the exact same reflection in voice as my dad. With particular strength on the word ' fucking' . Mum says they both stopped dead in their tracks and were rigid with shame.
Needless to say mum was not impressed. And even after dad popping his clog over 9 years ago I do not believe mum ever really forgave him for that one!! lol

So to all you parents out there remember kids hear it all we remember it all and most importantly god damn we mimic it all !!

Monday, January 01, 2007

Its a Happy New Year !!!

Ohhhhh sweet lord it is a happy new god damn year !!! You ask why it is a happy new year ???? BECAUSE PLEURISY DID NOT BLOODY KILL ME !!! It tried but dammit I won that battle!! So 2 bloody fingers up to you Mister Pluerisy go find another body to attack and poke at !!

So as you can read I am much much better. Here is a break down of the holiday seasons for this newly Canadian girl everyone:

  • The dread illness stuck around until xmas eve however it was not nearly as bad as it was the few days before. I could at least cough sneeze and fart without withering up into a ball of pain and agony
  • Unfortunately old saint nic was not on my side for xmas. I woke up xmas morning with a damn cold a pure head cold in its purest form possible. Luckly ( not so lucky for her though ha ha ) Mum woke up with it as well. So the 2 of us suffered through xmas day and boxing day with the damn thing in full steam. This of course did not hinder me in my child like joy of ripping off thoughtfully applied wrapping paper from all presents. The only thing that made the scene different from when I was a child was the massive cup of coffee in one hand and the fag in the ashtray !!!
  • Christmas was lovely though and it was every single thing I missed in my 5 year absence from my home country and family. In fact it was probably better then I imagined.
  • THE GIFTS : ohhh the gifts mum out did herself !!! I got the most stunning Fossil handbag which has yet to leave my side ( it is currently right beside me in full view of my bed ) I got books books and more books. This makes me so happy as only my mother seems to know exactly what books to get me as gifts. I have been reading my ass off endlessly. Also got cook books which also have already been put to good use. And of course I got my yearly dose of wedgewood ( those who know me and those who do not will now know I have a small addiction to wedgewood, not so small actually. I see blue I shake and get excited ) There are so many gifts cannot list them all but they rocked!
  • Hmmmmmm boxing day shopping. My lovely mum gave me 200 bucks to shop with as a pressie and shop I did. I am dedicated to the cause. Even with my leper like lokking cold I was out the door by 9 and in the worlds biggest mall, West Edmonton Mall, by a quarter to 10. I bought lovely things including shoes to match stunning new bag! I did buy the most impractical thing in the world, a white jacket. Again those who know me know that this is tempting fate to the biggest degree! However it has been a week and not a single stain.
  • New Years: I planned on doing cock all. My plan was to have a bath eat watch BBC Canada and likely be in bed before midnight. New years is not a big deal for me. However my little brown boy friend Ricardo called sad I was SAD IN A BIG WAY and said her had free tickets for me to go out with him my bro our comando dutch boy phil and others and i was to be there no questions asked. I went. I then entered the 5th dimmension of hell everyone...... a country and western bar. The one thing I escaped in the UK was country music. I may have grown up and spent my life in cowboy, prairey, the land of cows horses and wheat but I did not have any like of country music and cowboy hats. I was surounded. What made this situation worse was the fact that I had made the rather adult and stupid decision not to drink and to drive home at end of the night. Without the aid of booze it was even worse. I EVEN LINE DANCED !!!!!!!!!! GOD DAMMIT !!!!! SAVE ME IS WHAT I SCREAMED !!!!!! but you know what I actually had fun. Only in this country,province, and town was there a mechanical bull for all to ride in the middle of a bar !!! before you ask no I did not get on the bull, even if I had been pissed I still would not have got on the damn bull. ( I do have pics of all the others on the bull to share with you ) So new years was fun. I saw it in ( no i did not kiss anyone , why would I they all had cowboy hats on and jeans that would even be to tight for Kate Moss) and left 15 minutes later ...smiling and knowing I had a good time and a laugh with my friends and bmy baby brother.

So thats it for now really. I know I keep promising pics and I do have them. However my mother has this very odd talent of placing things in ' safe ' places and then never knowing where that place may be after the fact. So currently the cable thingy for the camera thingy is missing in this massive house somewhere. Once I find this I will down load and get them on here. So be prepared for a mass amount of pics everyone. Likely by tomorrow or Wednesday.

So love to all for now and ....HAPPY NEW YEAR !!! It is going to be a good one I can feel it in my waters