Tuesday, November 29, 2005

2 weeks and 4 Days till The Eagles Land

Yep the imminent arrival of the Taylor clan on English soil is fast approaching. It has to be said that I am extremely excited about them coming over here but at the same time have this small ball of fear in the pit of my stomach !

This could either be the best ever Christmas we have all had together or it could end in utter disaster with all of us threatening to stab one another repeatedly due to the fact we have driven one another absolutely mad ha ha !!

No but in all seriousness it is going to be great be nice for them to come over to me for the first time and see my life over here. Really excited at the thought of showing them things like my flat and car and most obviously my mad as a brush cat. I can't wait for Mum to see Manchester as I am fairly sure ( she will correct me as per usual ) that she still has this vision of grim, dark, grey and factory riddled Manchester of her youth. It is now this thoroughly modern urban hip city now ( yes I do realize it is Manchester I am talking about) !

Still trying to figure out what I am going to do with everyone for new year's!! I know that I want to show them a good time as at that point it is not just my Brother and my Sister coming but also Georges lovely girlfriend Amanda and his 2 best mates Richie and Phil. So it has to be a rocking amazing new years for them. High expectations is basically what it is.

The thing however I am utterly and truly most looking forward to is ....... My mum's cooking !!! Sweet lord I plan on making myself very ill front he amounts I am going to eat. Oh my mum's onion sauce hmmmm and her bacon wrapped little sausages hmmmm and her carrots with weird things on it hmmmmm and her roast beef !!!! hmmmm I am now currently drooling at my desk and on the verge of drowning from the drool as my work mates watch !! oh the food !!
so I will keep you all up dated and give you a after family visit report when they all leave as well as that I am pretty sure my sister. Now I have tried multiple times to get a link in here for Alex but I am useless guys sorry find her yourself if you want to read her blog!

Monday, November 28, 2005

Evil Evil Bug

Apologies for the total lack of writing on here of late. I have been deadly ill and stuck at home for the last week. Had sinatitus ( no clue how to spell that ) plus a touch ( if that is possible ) of glandular fever!! Needless to say no one wished to be near me even my bloody cat !!

Anyway this is going to be very short as I need to leave to try and get home in one piece. Why you ask ??? Becasue it is god damn bastard snowing and well people in the UK fall to bits at the site of small white bloody flakes !!

Will do a big entry next time for you all !!! promise!!!!!


Friday, November 18, 2005

Life is Currently Shafting me right up the Backside Right now !!!

OH MY GOD !!!!! I am currently on the verge of a break down and when I say break down I mean head spinning rocking in a corner whilst attempting to chew my own arm off break down. You are now either very worried for me, very scared of me ( most are ) or thinking dramatic cow ! Here are the reasons for the break down, yep reasons there are more then one right now !!

Firstly for the last 24 hours I have been working on something at work for a customer no names no details to obviously save my ass from any backlash. I have been busting my ass to get this to work and run smoothly..... And it has not !! I have called 4 different countries I have broken rules ( only small ones and after all for my customer as they always come first !! ) I have worked late and come in early to sort it . Only to be told just when all was completed and I could have this satisfied grin on my face that they no longer wanted it and were going to cancel !!!!! At this point in time I wish to find the nearest bar drink my self stupid pick a fight with some local scally cow and then stumble home ( bare in mind it is only 4 in the afternoon ) . I do try my best at work but I will also be the first to admit that I can become slightly impatient and can not handle indecsion either which does not help when dealing with customers. I have recently been try to make a serious effort to slow down take a step back and calm down before dealing with potentially volatile situations ..... This was my first major test and well I am fairly sure I handled it better then previous occasions

Secondly ...... Winter drivers in the UK !!! Jesus people get a fucking grip ok ! There is no snow on the ground there is no frozen ice there are no blowing snow storms or minus 30 temperatures. There is only a bit of frost on you cars!! Yet you all decide to drive like dick heads!!!! You break randomly you panic when the light goes yellow and you drive like you are 85 have no vision left and have the reaction time of those ugly things that hang in trees, sloth's. I do not have time in my mornings to have to pussy foot round you bastards ok ! Pull your thumbs learn how to drive or if you are that god damned scared of killing yourselves, which you eventually will due to your shitty driving skills, take the fucking bus !!!

Thirdly ....Fireworks!! Bonfire night is over you deliquient shits !! It was over almost 2 weeks ago!!! Please stop or I will hunt you down and shove the damn firework up your ass to see how much ya like it then ok ?? Understand ?? Probably not because you are more then likely a thick little bastard who thinks school is far to uncool for you. Also explain why you let the fire works off in the day?? ya can't see it !! Is it the funny little sound that amuses you ??? Cause it does not fucking amuse me in my afternoon nap on a Sunday ( yes I nap on Sunday's dare you to make funny of me in my present state of mind come on dare you )

So yeah shafted right now shafted and not best pleased. I am going to go to the gym after work ( 25 mins to go ) and work my fat ass off to the point of exhaustion and then drink some vodka and pass out in bed by 8. I am a product of my upbringing, the answer to all is booze !!!
happy weekend all !!

p.s if there are spelling errors on this one just let it go it is obvious I am slightly off balance at present !

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

What makes you Happy? What Makes you Laugh?

Those are two very big questions in life I believe and also two very important ones as well.


A multiple of things made me happy when I was a kid some things maybe considered well odd !
I took great pleasure in torturing my little brother to no end this of course made me endlessly happy. But it was also a happiness that was shared with my younger sister Alex who also found happiness in this recreational sport ! Was great ( he got big we stopped no more happiness unfortunately )

I believe through my teens I took great pleasure and created that happy feeling within myself by effectively being a pain in the ass ( some would say I am currently still am a pain in the ass just a more refinded one with possibly a bigger vocabulary ) I do think that deep down most teens make it their mission to be a pain in the ass and do make themselves happy by doing that.

Now that I am adult ( or so I like to convince myself I am adult) My aim for happiness has shifted drastically!! I want very adult things like stability and well general contentment if that makes sense. It suddenly dawned on me that this meant I had grown up that I was semi rational and well adult like at times. I now get sheer joy out of things like a Ikea catalogue !!! Oh my good god that is not normal but it makes me happy!!

I also think we all look for things to make us happy. Men want a wife that they can brag about to there buddies about either in a nice way or lets face it in a filthy way. Women obviously are much harder to please and as a women I will be the first to admit this. We want everything to be perfect we want a lovely house with enviable furnishings. We want a husband boyfriend or partner that is the strong type but the sensitive type at the same time ( this of course makes men spin on the spot and they have no idea if they are coming or going) Women want that feeling of a strong minded man I truly think this makes them happy. I have to say I do think along those lines. We do not like weak men as then there is no challenge. Women also want that lifestyle that well lets be honest only 10% of the population getyou know the one with 2 holidays a year and garden parties in summers things like that.
So yeah basically that is my idea of what makes people happy , maybe not everyone and maybe there are people that disagree but the general idea of what I wrote is something people want to create happiness.


Now this is a whole different kettle of fish it has to be said.

When I was a kid it was watching my little brother being picked on by my sister and then joining in making him beg for mercy ( we currently are not able to do this due to the fact that he suddenly became a giant and well he is actually turning into a decent human being as well pains me to say that of course )

When I was a teen it was watching what I deemed as the popular girls or bubble heads make tits of themselves god damn used to laugh when they did something deemed as ' uncool' was great.

Now though god damn things make me laugh all the time!! For example recently my cat got some tape stuck on his tale and I had hours of pure amusement due to the fact that he ran round chasing his tale trying to get the tape off. Then when he did get it off got stuck on his wiskers and there was yet more laughter.
TV is well and truly funny right now I mean Little Britain alone is the most laughable funny thing out there right now.
But even funnier as it was when I was a teen is watching people make tit's of themselves you know falling up stairs and tripping on the sidewalk. After they do these clumsy things the funny bit is actually the look on their faces and the thought that is virtually scrolling across their foreheads in neon lights that reads ' no one saw me do that absolutely no one !! I am fine and I am graceful' mean while I purposely stare at them and laugh scrolling again ' Fuck that evil bitch saw me and now she is laughing and going to tell everyone she knows about me !!'
Ok you may now be thinking Louisa is evil but damn I so know deep down you are all thinking ' yeah I may have a laugh as well ha ha'

So I basically believe that the current human population likes to laugh at other peoples expense and love watching others make absolute fools of themselves. Pure slap stick comedy is what it boils down to at the end of the day
babble finished now !

Friday, November 11, 2005

Blogging From Brussels

Hello all!! As you can guess I am currently writing to you from Brussels sitting in my sister Alex's flat or as it should be called a show box ha ha !! I will never complain about the size of my flat and feel nothing but sympathy for my sister! You could almost out stretch your arms and touch a wall on either side!! But I will say it is very cute and it has a lovely balcony as well which when the sun is out would be really nice. So I am glad I have been able to see where my little sister now lives and can safely say it is not a crack house !!

Right back to the trip. Matt and I caught the Eurostar this morning and I have to say I was really impressed with it all. Train was comfortable seats big and nice smooth uneventful ride was perfect to be honest. We are staying in the Radisson right off the grande place and it is amazing ! 5 star hotel amzing room lovely design and completely worth the trip for if anything oh yeah obvious to see Alex is worth it as well!!

So yeah will be doing all the tourist things tomorrow and then Matt is taking me for a nice belated birthday dinner and then back to normal life.
Can't wait for tomorrow plan on making myself ill off waffles !!!!
Oh yeah in case you are wondering to yourself ' why is Louisa on a weekend break and blogging ?!?!' well Alex is making us dinner so just relaxing after a days traveling and looking forward to the steak for dinner !!
have a great weekend all !!

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Nothing better then Speaking to Your Parents

You know when I was a kid I would sort of dread speaking to my parents for fear of them finding out what terrible evil thing I had done as a kid or a teenager. They seemed to have this way of knowing without me even speaking and damn that scared the shit out of me! And it was my mum who seemed to be the best at it.

There was one area where we seemed to out smart the old parent firm. Alex and I were brutal to a then little George ( not so little now at about 6"5 ) We did horrible things to him like duct taped him to a pole in out basement stuffed a sock in his mouth and proceeded to write, with permanent pen mind you, idiot but spelt ediot !! ha ha left him there for a few good hours. We used to sit on him tickle him till he pissed himself !! You know we always managed to blame these things on George and we got away with it 90% of the time. Then he got big beat the crap out of me one day never picked on him again. Even stranger now he has kinda taken the place of Dad and become slightly protective of his big sisters awwwwww!

Anyway back to Mum She has only gotten better at it since my Dad died 7 years ago. It was like she sapped up all his super human lie detecting skills to double her super parenting skills. Truly scary when you think about it. Unlike a lot of kids myself, Alex my sister and George my brother generally were not able to play one parent off the other they were intertwined and knew when the kids were working them. I mean we had friends who would call our dad sergeant scary ok ! How bad is that !! And our mum had these super human strengths of knowing exactly what we were up to or worse to get it out of us. They played kid off kid, which proved highly effective.

When I moved to the UK 4 years ago I thought I would be out of this super human mum radar and be safe .....How wrong was I ! My mum can still phone me have a conversation then ask me if the place is clean?? I lie say yep sure is mum spotless. And that would be my fatal error using the word spotless cause she so knew that would defy all laws on earth for me to be spotless. SO then I will break down and say yes will clean it up not dirty just untidy that's all. What makes it worse is that I will start cleaning whilst on the phone with her still !!!!!!!!!!!!! As if she will ever know I did half way across the world !!!!! So this has gone on for the first 3 1/2 years when my mum calls ... But something has changed lately

My mum speaks to me differently now like well like I am a adult that can hold a half decent conversation. I no longer annoy her anymore I think plus she genuinely seems truly happy to speak to me !! Now please do not get me wrong my mum is a super star and yes I do know she loves her ' blossom' as she calls me but I also know that I have been the bane of my mothers existence for the last decade or so and only recently have I realized what a pain in the ass I was.

I love calling my mum now you know. Seriously for some reason always have a stupid grin on my face after and well the evening always goes well too after a chat with her. But hey she still has a go such as ' stop spending money ?' ' remember you owe me money ?' ( by the way what kid does not owe their parent money I ask ?? ) ' still smoking ?? You do know it is killing you ??'
Basically the usual things. But not nearly as bad as it once was which is kinda nice to be honest.

So there you go there is nothing better then speaking to your parents. They make you think and reevaluate things in your life. They manage to cheer you up and at the same time knock your cocky ass back on the ground which I think everyone most definitely needs once and a while

Yep I went mushy on you all today sorry have to be mushy and sentimental on the odd occasion has to be done !

Wednesday, November 02, 2005


Home. Home is most definitely Canada for me. Recently I have been inundated with questions regarding my home. The biggest ones are what are you doing here in the UK ? And Will you ever go back to Canada and where would you live?
So I have to say it has been on my mind a lot of late.
Why do I stay here ?? Not sure to be honest something about it pulls me in. I love the lifestyle and the fashion. I however do not like the cost of living and sometimes the restrictions as well. By that I mean the cost of the living adds a massive amount of restrictions on what you can do in the sense that you are limited financial. However there are so many more things to do here in the cities then back in Canada. Things like Museums are generally free which is wicked as far as I am concerned. Also as much as the British complain about the bad public transportation it is amazing in comparison!! Never understood why they complain about it all makes no sense at all.

Things that kinda suck are the the kids over here. The are rude badly brought up, lack morals and ethics, they are lazy, and most of all they are thugs and bullies. I would never in my wildest dreams allow any child of mine to be brought up over here or to be educated over here as there seems to be some serious things lacking such as simple discipline. The government well it kinda sucks but what makes it worse is the fact that at present there is no creditable option to lean towards. They seem to have neglected the health care system and have forgotten the basic needs of ordinary people and are more concerned with their inside conflicts and bickering.

But right now I still like living here if I am honest.

Canada hmm. What can I say it is magnificent and beautiful. There are lovely people and cultures over there and they are generally embraced whole heartedly by other Canadians. Do not get me wrong there are still the same issues over there as there are here about refugees and people seeming to think that all people different are spongers and evil.

It is clean !!!! Oh sweet lord it is clean over there and I miss that. I also miss winter never thought the day would come when I would say I miss winter ! What I miss about it is that feeling on a Sunday morning when you lie in bed ake up and look out the window to -30 and winter wonderland. Where the window is frozen shut and there are ice crystals everywhere and it is bright white. And all you do is snuggle that little bit further down into the covers enjoy the warmth and stay there. It is something everyone needs to experience once in their life.
I miss my family a lot as well. It is not so much the physical people but the feeling you get from having them about even when you are arguing. It is just nice to have that support network about you when ever you want. I think a lot of people tend to foget that unlike them I am here alone so when things go wrong I am not able to just pop over to my mum's and bash it out. If I want a day with my family I do not get it. So unlike others most nights I go home and well that's it me and the cat.

Would I ever go back?? A year ago I said no would never go back to Canada , 6 motnhs ago I also said nope never going back. Now yes I can safely say my mind has changed and eventually I want to go back. There are so many reasons.
First the cost of living and lifestyle is better by far and completely proven now as well the best place to live in the world is Canada more specifically Vancouver which is where I would want to move back to. The job prospects are better the houses are bigger classier and lets face it a damn site bloody cheaper then the shit over here in the UK !!! Only in the UK would you have a room called a box room !!!!! ( Canadian translation : fucking tiny guys )

The food is better as well as in more fresh fruit and veg and cheaper better quality. But the biggest thing is Canada I believe or at least certain parts of it are on a major up turn and boom and so completely worth it! So yeah I will eventually move back to the mother land and live there for my own sanity. When?? Not a clue at all!! Need to pay my car off firstly ha ha !!

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

I am turning into a old lady ...... And Kinda like it !!

Last night I was in a long text discussion with the lovely Sarah. The premise of the entire conversation ( if you can call texting a conversation not sure on that on?? ) was who was the older acting lady.
While she was telling me she was already in bed ( 6:30 !!) in her warmest cloths tucked up. I was telling her I was curled up on the couch in PJ's heating on full blast considering just going to bed .
She one upped me then with the fact that she was eating a chocolate mint orange and watching .....Wait for it ...... Bill Oddy's wildlife adventures !!!! oh my god that is such a OAP thing to do !
But I do believe I beat her as I advised her I was on the couch watching eastenders with not 1 but 2!!! hotwater bottles on me plus I was eating digestive hmmmm

So anyway I have decided that maybe getting old is not a bad thing. Maybe being able to curl up on your bed or couch and do fuck all when ever you wish is pretty damn cool.
And anyone who slates hot water bottles is missing out big time. They are great and not just for old people either it has to be said. It is like heaven in a little rubber bottle hmmmm want a hot water bottle now .....hmmmmm

Plus there are hidden benefits to being old as well I think. You can slag of just about every young person out there and people let you !!! Because you are old !!! You get to ride the bus for free as well. Although I find that slightly amusing cause buses are not the easiest things to get on and when you are 85 and have had 2 hip replacements you really would not want to get on would you lets be honest !?
You get lower council tax !! And you get assitance with your utility bills.
So basically I have decided screw being young I want to be a crazy OAP and live the high life !!!

So as you may be able to tell I have completely resigned to getting old and I am now in fact embracing it and well god damn cannot come quick enough.
All I need to do now is convince Sarah some how that she will not die a old crazy spinster lady and even if she is a spinster she can come live with me and we can be crazy OAP's together like bonny and Clyde ( but not so gangster like )
Believe my new mission in life is to get people to embrace getting old to be OAP's even in their 20's and 30's

( so not going to succeed in this mission am I ? )