Wednesday, January 30, 2008

I have been Revamped People !

I've moved my blog to Wordpress. The new link is This blog will self-destruct redirect in 5 seconds! Please update your links. See you on the other side all !!!!

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Drivers in this Country Suck !

So today I was driving into work on my usual route. I have driven this road all my life. Due to the fact that I live out in the wilds of the country I have to take the main highway ( motorway for the English folk) into Edmonton. I have never really had a problem with this road, never been in ditch, never hit a deer or another car even …always a bonus not hitting other cars you know ( although i have hit a light post ...head on ).
So anyway this morning the roads were excellent conditions. There was minimal traffic. There was no ice. It was not snowing and there was no wind. Seriously for winter driving you could not ask for better conditions. Apperantely I was the only person who realised that these were good roads??? Firstly everyone was driving at least 30 km below the limit…IN THE GOD DAMN PASSING LANE ( Dammit that is my biggest pet peeve seriously i yell at these people as I drive by you know ! ) Everyone was on tenter-hooks for some reason. I have no idea why though. Greta the Golf and I were flyin.
Then it got worse….a lot worse. I drove out of one of the satalite towns, Spruce Grove, smack into mayhem. There were 6 yes 6!! cars in the ditch all lined up like neat little matches. Seriously I have no freakin idea how these fools ended up in the ditch. The roads were dry, there was no snow and for sure no black ice. Yet these idiots managed to get there vehicles in the ditch.
I miss British roads in such a big way. People move over when you crawl up there ass. People do not end up in ditches randomly AND the traffic reports rock!!! They are always right and up to date!! Over here they will say something like south bound Anthony Henday right lane accident stay left. When in actual fact it will be North bound left lane !!! So irritating.
Ok I am done now. My rant is finished …until the next fool pulls in front of me for no god damn reason other then they were clearly bored in the other lane and thought ” what the hell lets see if the other lane is less boring ..” FOOLS

I am Materialistic and Proud People

I am going to go on a bit of a rant today …just fore warning you all ok!

I am of the belief that wanting things for you, material things, is not being materialistic. For reasons unknown to me some people are of the belief that if you want these things you are someone of low moral standing or materialistic! I have sooo many issues with that.
If I want to live in the big house or uber cool condo or if I want to have the range rover and the state of the art gadgets does that make me a bad person?! I THINK BLOODY NOT PEOPLE!
They say that money does not buy you happiness and I agree with that however I am believe that it most certainly makes you happy. It makes you feel as though you have accomplished something in your life. It makes you self worth and self esteem rocket through the roof. In my eyes this is a good thing people.
So I am proud to admit I want those things. I want to be able to just go away for a weekend to Vegas or to San Francisco because I simply can afford to do that. I want to be able to go into a store and pick the nicest furniture not the furniture that I can afford but the furniture I want. I see no issue in being proud of excelling financially and materialistically. It does not make me a lesser person or someone of low moral standings. In fact it makes me an ambitious and self thriving self rewarding person and there is nothing wrong with that.
Do not get me wrong I do want the little things in life to make me happy. A book to read on a Saturday afternoon in the winter. Breakfast in bed on a Sunday from the guy I love. Curling up on the couch and vegetating for hours with that guy. These are things that do not cost money and make me happy. But of course knowing I am secure in my future that I am able to get what I want out of life helps in everyway to make me a sane high self esteemed girl.
So you know I take issue with people that look down upon others that make something for themselves, in my eyes it is a form of jealousy. Rather then being a jealous person why not spend your energy on striving for those things you want out of life rather then wasting the precious energy you have in down playing what others have done for themselves!
Rant done

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Yes people The Lazy one Has Returned :-) I know yo Missed me ! ha !

Ok now for the big amazing spinning my world around news guys. I have finally got my self booked in for my plastic surgery. For those of you who do not know this is the back story to it all. I have spent 18 months of hard times and work losing weight. I need to make it clear that I was not doing this out of social pressures to be thin or to fit in. I was doing this for myself and for myself to be health, So my total weight loss currently stands at 110 pounds I have gone down from a size 24 to a size 18/16. I have lost untold inches everywhere and I am damn proud of myself as is my family and friends. So after all that I had let’s say “skin issues”??? So the only way to solve that and bring me down to my true size(12/14) was a tummy tuck. After 6 months of waiting for one of the best surgeons in Edmonton I got in. He took one look at me listened to my story and then promptly informed me I was a prime surgery candidate and that the results will be remarkable ! So I go under the knife on the 7th of May. I will be off work for 12 days and off riding duties and gym for 6 -7 weeks ( boohoo! ) I will have a scar from hip to hip on my bikini line and I will be in pain …but it is worth it. I do regret a few things though. I regret not having a boyfriend before hand. You are asking why now aren’t you ? It is very simple really, I wanted to be sure that whom ever I start dating is dating me for me not for the new thinner tighter ab’s covered me. I am worried I will only attract a guy who wants as stated before “ Barbie” or cheerleader” or “stupid” none of which I am people !!! I am of the mindset that if you cannot accept me for all my faults and flaws now then bugger it not worth my time. But you know that is how life rolls I guess and you just have to go with what is thrown you way.
So either way all my hard work has finally paid off and let me tell you when this is all done ….I AM SHOPPIN MY SKINNY ASS OFF PEOPLE !

I am now riding a stunning new mare that my friend Aron has lined up for me. I adore riding her and I think that this partnership is going to go a long way. We seem to suit one another and she challenges me which is what I need in a horse. I am now riding at very private and exclusive stables where she is living and where Aron is as well. I have to say I feel like a bit of an imposter when I am there and as though I am imposing on people. However this will vanish within time and I will get comfortable and settle in. Rode last night properly for the first time with Aron in YEARS ! It was like being 12 all over again and so strange. But best of all Aron gave me a mini lesson and I can safely say the girl ROCKS! She had me thinking about my seat about how I was asking the horse and making the horse move. In those short 20 minutes or so I learnt huge amounts So I cannot wait for a full lesson from her and to basically suck her knowledge in like a sponge ( I am very sponge like people just so you know ! )

So as said before I am off to Jasper for my first skiing of the season. I am super stoked for both the days of skiing and the crazy ass nights at Pete’s in Jasper and the Gallon of beer policies !! There will of course be a shed load of pics for you all !!

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Pay it Forward

I am a believer in the practice or idea of paying it forward. In case you are not aware of what “ paying it forward” means or you live under a rock …which some of you may do so I apologies for poking fun at your humble abode…I am sure it is lovely under that rock of yours, I will give you a brief explanation to the best of my ability.

Paying it forward is a simple concept really. Lets say someone does you a good deed such as puts money in your parking meter when you are about to run out of time and the parking ticket Nazis is on his way to nail a ticket to your windscreen. Some random stranger pumps your meter and has done you a good deed for the day ( hopefully he flipped the bird to the parking ticket Nazis as well ) So the next day you see someone struggling to cross the road with a insane amount of pages and things are dropping and it is basically a walking time bomb of tears. You offer to help them get across the road. That is paying it forward. Paying the good deed done to you onto others hence the term paying it forward.

I have always tried to do this normally it is on a smaller scale. So it’s not like I am giving away thousands of dollars or open charities to help people. Its little things like the above mentioned. It is something you do for free that feels just as good as buying that new pair of jeans or handbag or drink lol.

In my travels I had an enormous amount of kindness shown to me. This was never a pity style kindness or a charity case. It was just people willing to be kind towards me at that moment. Some of the clearest and most ingrain memories are the holidays. I was living in a country with no one around me for a few Christmases I was also single so I did not have that other person to lean on or rely on during the holidays. I spent one Christmas alone and can safely say it was the most suicidal depressing experience of my life. There is nothing worse then sitting in your flat alone getting pissed and eating a microwave dinner because all you can think is “ fuck this I am not cooking or celebrating” So when friends asked me to come to theirs one year it was actually hard to hold back the emotions at the enormity of my situation at that time. I had friends also entertain my very North American concept of Thanksgiving. They seemed to realize that this was important to me and that they needed to be there for me as friends and people who understood me and my need to have that thanksgiving that year.

So I have always wanted to “pay it forward” knowing how that situation feels. Waking up on Christmas morning to a silent house, no smell of food or the smell of Christmas. Waking up and knowing that for the rest of the day everyone around you would be laughing, eating crying, arguing and generally enjoying Christmas while you are effectively the sad bastard by yourself.
Paying it forward is not a pity thing this needs to be made clear to all. Paying it forward is not something that is asked for. It is something that is done out of kindness and from the heart. It is not done with the intent that it has to be done back to you at one point. It is not done to make the other person feel as though they are in debt to you. It is simply done for the kind act and good deed that it is and that is all.

So this year why don’t you try and pay it forward people. Find the littlest thing and just do it. Make that effort and do you’re paying it forward for the day, month or even year. It is the time of year that things like this should come as second nature to you all.

So yes everyone …go and …PAY IT FORWARD PLEASE

Friday, December 14, 2007

Just Have a Little Patience

I have written a fair amount about my current single state and my lack of relationship. I know some may get bored of it but its my blog and as stated before this is what I believe sites like these are for. They are your sounding board. They are the place where you get things off your chest you just do it to the rest of the world. Doing it to the rest of the world can actually be somewhat comforting you know, knowing anonymous people are reading about your problems and potentially identifying with them as well.

You know as much as I profess to it not being a bad thing being single it is at some times. I do not handle single well you know. It’s a unfamiliar feeling for me. I have always been part of a pair for at least the last 10 years and so when you go through a stage of not being a part of that “pair” you begin to doubt yourself which is never fun.

However some of my closest friends have consitantly told me that it will happen and not to work myself up over it. But the one word that resonates most is the word PATIENCE.
I am told by close and old friends that patience is what I need and that things happen when they need to and for a reason. Mason said to me the other month that you have to go through a bag full of shitheads before you find that one that is not a ass and is what you want. You know what he is right.
I seem to attract 2 kinds of men,. Either the girly boys or the bad boys. Seriously there is no in between. I can’t handle the girly men I am thinking I do not need to explain that. As for the bad boys…I admit I like them but they are never a good thing. I want that in between boy. A guy who is a “guy” who knows that he is meant to be a man but at the same time has that sensitive side that appears on occasion. I like commanding men and you know they are so hard to find these days.

So I will go with what friends like Aron and Mason say and that is patience. I will have patience and wait to see what rolls my way.
Lyrics from a song that sums it all up right now. Take That “Patience”

Just have a little patience
I'm still hurting from a love I lost,I'm feeling your frustration,That any minute all the pain will stop,Just hold, me close, inside your arms, tonight,don't be too hard on my emotions,
'Cause I, need time.My heart is numb, has no feeling.So while I'm still healing,Just try, and have a little patience
I really want to start over again,I know you wanna be my salvation.The one that I could always depend,
I'll try to be strong believe me,I'm trying to move on,It's complicated but understand me.
'Cause I, need time,My heart is numb has no feeling,So while I'm still healing,Just try, and have a little patience,have a little patience,
'Cause the scars run so deep,It's been hardBut I have to believe.
Have a little patience,
Have a little patience,
Woah, Cause I, I just need time,My heart is numb has no feeling,So while I'm still healing,just try, and have a little patience,have a little patience,
My heart is numb, has no feeling,So while I'm still healing,just try, and have a little... Patience

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

I Miss British Men

God I really miss English Men!!! You cannot comprehend how much I miss them. See the creatures that are English men and the creatures that are Canadian Men are 2 very very different species.

They are so different it is scary. It makes a girls head spin endlessly with self doubt. So I will try and explain the difference between the 2 creatures and let me tell you they are complete opposites.

Canadian Men

They are such self involved men. I find that they think of themselves as more then they are. It’s almost as if they have airs above their stations. They believe themselves to be god’s gift to all and sundry.
Canadian men appear to only want 3 types of women either invidually or combined: The stick insect (she lives of lettuce leaves and only that…maybe water if she is lucky). The Barbie doll cheerleader. They effectively bounce around a whole lot generally not very smart. Although they are thin they have big knockers and a giant ass…Canadian men seem to appreciate this for some reason. Finally the fake not remotely real girl. These girls are also bitches to be honest. They always seem to be in uber bitch mode and have perfect hair.
Heaven forbid that a Canadian man wants a real woman. Or women who will challenge them or make them think…oh yes to be able to think guys! They do not want a woman who is real and laughs from the belly, will eat a hamburger because it simply looks damn good!
The other big difference is as follows. Canadian men do not look after themselves. They generally have some of the worst dress sense on the face of the earth. By this I mean flannel shirts and white socks with dress pants…YES I AM SERIOUS. They may get a decent haircut once every 6 months for if they go every month or 2 months they fear they may be thought of as “gay” yep very gay…give me a break.
But most of all I find them judgmental. This one really irks me. I am not one to blow a guy out upon first meeting them I am someone who will give them a chance. Maybe that’s the idealist within me?? I do not know

British Men

They do have faults before I start but they are so minor in comparison to Canadian men.

First of all a British guy as far as I am concerned cannot be bothered with stupid women. They really can’t. They seem to pick the more intelligent women out there and that rocks as far as I am concerned.
British men tend not to like the skinny girls of the world. They appear to love a woman who has some substance to her. They like something to hold onto I guess?
British men make laugh endlessly. They are damn funny people. They are self deprecating and sarcastic. They know exactly what button to push with me to make me giggle a proper giggle.
British men DO look after themselves. The myth that they all have bad hair, bad teeth and bad glasses is so very wrong. British men go to the hairdresser regularly. They wear the coolest sexiest cloths. Some even get manicures…no this is not gay! I personally would like a guy who touches me to have good hands people is that not to much to ask?
They spend time buying great cloths that SUIT them.
But most of all as far as my experiences have been up until now compared to Canadian men British men know how to love. They seem to be able to express themselves so much better. They do not wait for a girl to make the move before they do. They just tend throw it out there.

So yep there it is I prefer British men. Now do not get me wrong there is likely a Canadian guy out there who will turn my opinion. A guy who will turn my head and make me pay attention to them. I just wish they would kind of appear now because currently they are not doing a very damn good job you know!

Friday, November 16, 2007

Defining True Friendship

Friendship is defined so differently by each individual. I do believe that some people have what is a warped version of friendship. They believe it as a status symbol if they are friends with a certain person. They believe it good to be friends with a rich person or a powerful person. To me this is a warped and strange version of friendship.

I have always had “friends” who I class as fair weather friends. Then I have my true and deep friends and there are not many of them. This is not because no one wants to be friends with me this is because I choose a select few to spend my time and energy on. I chose a small group so I can spend MORE time with them rather then having vast amounts of friends and spreading myself thin.

My friends mean the world to me. They are my backbone and my reality check. Friends like Aron remind me to have fun all the time and she reminds me I am of value and worth something. Friends like Mason remind me I am beautiful and needed all the time. These are true friends.

These are a few things that I believe describe true friendship in my eyes:

A true friend will catch me when I fall
A true friend will accept me for me and my faults and flaws and will celebrate those with me.
I can call a true friend when I am heartbroken and babble endlessly and although I may feel a fool that friend will never let me believe I am a fool.
To me a true friend is someone I would trust my deepest and darkest secrets with. Being safe in the knowledge that those secrets are in the vaults for a life time and will never escape.
A true friend is someone I would trust my life and my heart with.
True friends will tell you the hard cold and honest truth. At the time it may appear to be painful and hurtful but that is never the intent. The intent of that friend is to remind you of whom you are and where you are going astray. Only a friend can do this best.
A true friend is someone you make a godparent to your child not because they are just a true friend but because the0y are the type of person who has the right character traits to guide your child through life.
True friends will tell you that you are a beautiful person and when they tell you that you know it is true and honest.
True friends are there for you when there is catastrophe and when there is endless pain
A true friend is there when there is nothing but pure joy in your life.

The list could be endless but rest assured that my true friends fit every single one of those descriptions and even more. I would do anything for my friends. If had all the money in the world I would take them on the biggest most incredibly fun and insane world trip just because it would be FUN!!
I know that I am so fortunate to have the friends I have. I know that there are people out there who are not as lucky as me and are missing out on the incredible feeling of true and steady friendship
This is what I have true and steady friendship. The love of a good friend is so very hard to describe I just know that I have that love everyday