2 weeks and 4 Days till The Eagles Land

Yep the imminent arrival of the Taylor clan on English soil is fast approaching. It has to be said that I am extremely excited about them coming over here but at the same time have this small ball of fear in the pit of my stomach !

This could either be the best ever Christmas we have all had together or it could end in utter disaster with all of us threatening to stab one another repeatedly due to the fact we have driven one another absolutely mad ha ha !!

No but in all seriousness it is going to be great be nice for them to come over to me for the first time and see my life over here. Really excited at the thought of showing them things like my flat and car and most obviously my mad as a brush cat. I can't wait for Mum to see Manchester as I am fairly sure ( she will correct me as per usual ) that she still has this vision of grim, dark, grey and factory riddled Manchester of her youth. It is now this thoroughly modern urban hip city now ( yes I do realize it is Manchester I am talking about) !

Still trying to figure out what I am going to do with everyone for new year's!! I know that I want to show them a good time as at that point it is not just my Brother and my Sister coming but also Georges lovely girlfriend Amanda and his 2 best mates Richie and Phil. So it has to be a rocking amazing new years for them. High expectations is basically what it is.

The thing however I am utterly and truly most looking forward to is ....... My mum's cooking !!! Sweet lord I plan on making myself very ill front he amounts I am going to eat. Oh my mum's onion sauce hmmmm and her bacon wrapped little sausages hmmmm and her carrots with weird things on it hmmmmm and her roast beef !!!! hmmmm I am now currently drooling at my desk and on the verge of drowning from the drool as my work mates watch !! oh the food !!
so I will keep you all up dated and give you a after family visit report when they all leave as well as that I am pretty sure my sister. Now I have tried multiple times to get a link in here for Alex but I am useless guys sorry find her yourself if you want to read her blog!

Evil Evil Bug

Apologies for the total lack of writing on here of late. I have been deadly ill and stuck at home for the last week. Had sinatitus ( no clue how to spell that ) plus a touch ( if that is possible ) of glandular fever!! Needless to say no one wished to be near me even my bloody cat !!

Anyway this is going to be very short as I need to leave to try and get home in one piece. Why you ask ??? Becasue it is god damn bastard snowing and well people in the UK fall to bits at the site of small white bloody flakes !!

Will do a big entry next time for you all !!! promise!!!!!


xx

Life is Currently Shafting me right up the Backside Right now !!!

OH MY GOD !!!!! I am currently on the verge of a break down and when I say break down I mean head spinning rocking in a corner whilst attempting to chew my own arm off break down. You are now either very worried for me, very scared of me ( most are ) or thinking dramatic cow ! Here are the reasons for the break down, yep reasons there are more then one right now !!

Firstly for the last 24 hours I have been working on something at work for a customer no names no details to obviously save my ass from any backlash. I have been busting my ass to get this to work and run smoothly..... And it has not !! I have called 4 different countries I have broken rules ( only small ones and after all for my customer as they always come first !! ) I have worked late and come in early to sort it . Only to be told just when all was completed and I could have this satisfied grin on my face that they no longer wanted it and were going to cancel !!!!! At this point in time I wish to find the nearest bar drink my self stupid pick a fight with some local scally cow and then stumble home ( bare in mind it is only 4 in the afternoon ) . I do try my best at work but I will also be the first to admit that I can become slightly impatient and can not handle indecsion either which does not help when dealing with customers. I have recently been try to make a serious effort to slow down take a step back and calm down before dealing with potentially volatile situations ..... This was my first major test and well I am fairly sure I handled it better then previous occasions

Secondly ...... Winter drivers in the UK !!! Jesus people get a fucking grip ok ! There is no snow on the ground there is no frozen ice there are no blowing snow storms or minus 30 temperatures. There is only a bit of frost on you cars!! Yet you all decide to drive like dick heads!!!! You break randomly you panic when the light goes yellow and you drive like you are 85 have no vision left and have the reaction time of those ugly things that hang in trees, sloth's. I do not have time in my mornings to have to pussy foot round you bastards ok ! Pull your thumbs learn how to drive or if you are that god damned scared of killing yourselves, which you eventually will due to your shitty driving skills, take the fucking bus !!!

Thirdly ....Fireworks!! Bonfire night is over you deliquient shits !! It was over almost 2 weeks ago!!! Please stop or I will hunt you down and shove the damn firework up your ass to see how much ya like it then ok ?? Understand ?? Probably not because you are more then likely a thick little bastard who thinks school is far to uncool for you. Also explain why you let the fire works off in the day?? ya can't see it !! Is it the funny little sound that amuses you ??? Cause it does not fucking amuse me in my afternoon nap on a Sunday ( yes I nap on Sunday's dare you to make funny of me in my present state of mind come on dare you )


So yeah shafted right now shafted and not best pleased. I am going to go to the gym after work ( 25 mins to go ) and work my fat ass off to the point of exhaustion and then drink some vodka and pass out in bed by 8. I am a product of my upbringing, the answer to all is booze !!!
happy weekend all !!

p.s if there are spelling errors on this one just let it go it is obvious I am slightly off balance at present !

What makes you Happy? What Makes you Laugh?

Those are two very big questions in life I believe and also two very important ones as well.

WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY ??

A multiple of things made me happy when I was a kid some things maybe considered well odd !
I took great pleasure in torturing my little brother to no end this of course made me endlessly happy. But it was also a happiness that was shared with my younger sister Alex who also found happiness in this recreational sport ! Was great ( he got big we stopped no more happiness unfortunately )

I believe through my teens I took great pleasure and created that happy feeling within myself by effectively being a pain in the ass ( some would say I am currently still am a pain in the ass just a more refinded one with possibly a bigger vocabulary ) I do think that deep down most teens make it their mission to be a pain in the ass and do make themselves happy by doing that.

Now that I am adult ( or so I like to convince myself I am adult) My aim for happiness has shifted drastically!! I want very adult things like stability and well general contentment if that makes sense. It suddenly dawned on me that this meant I had grown up that I was semi rational and well adult like at times. I now get sheer joy out of things like a Ikea catalogue !!! Oh my good god that is not normal but it makes me happy!!

I also think we all look for things to make us happy. Men want a wife that they can brag about to there buddies about either in a nice way or lets face it in a filthy way. Women obviously are much harder to please and as a women I will be the first to admit this. We want everything to be perfect we want a lovely house with enviable furnishings. We want a husband boyfriend or partner that is the strong type but the sensitive type at the same time ( this of course makes men spin on the spot and they have no idea if they are coming or going) Women want that feeling of a strong minded man I truly think this makes them happy. I have to say I do think along those lines. We do not like weak men as then there is no challenge. Women also want that lifestyle that well lets be honest only 10% of the population getyou know the one with 2 holidays a year and garden parties in summers things like that.
So yeah basically that is my idea of what makes people happy , maybe not everyone and maybe there are people that disagree but the general idea of what I wrote is something people want to create happiness.

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH ???

Now this is a whole different kettle of fish it has to be said.

When I was a kid it was watching my little brother being picked on by my sister and then joining in making him beg for mercy ( we currently are not able to do this due to the fact that he suddenly became a giant and well he is actually turning into a decent human being as well pains me to say that of course )

When I was a teen it was watching what I deemed as the popular girls or bubble heads make tits of themselves god damn used to laugh when they did something deemed as ' uncool' was great.

Now though god damn things make me laugh all the time!! For example recently my cat got some tape stuck on his tale and I had hours of pure amusement due to the fact that he ran round chasing his tale trying to get the tape off. Then when he did get it off got stuck on his wiskers and there was yet more laughter.
TV is well and truly funny right now I mean Little Britain alone is the most laughable funny thing out there right now.
But even funnier as it was when I was a teen is watching people make tit's of themselves you know falling up stairs and tripping on the sidewalk. After they do these clumsy things the funny bit is actually the look on their faces and the thought that is virtually scrolling across their foreheads in neon lights that reads ' no one saw me do that absolutely no one !! I am fine and I am graceful' mean while I purposely stare at them and laugh scrolling again ' Fuck that evil bitch saw me and now she is laughing and going to tell everyone she knows about me !!'
Ok you may now be thinking Louisa is evil but damn I so know deep down you are all thinking ' yeah I may have a laugh as well ha ha'

So I basically believe that the current human population likes to laugh at other peoples expense and love watching others make absolute fools of themselves. Pure slap stick comedy is what it boils down to at the end of the day
babble finished now !

Blogging From Brussels

Hello all!! As you can guess I am currently writing to you from Brussels sitting in my sister Alex's flat or as it should be called a show box ha ha !! I will never complain about the size of my flat and feel nothing but sympathy for my sister! You could almost out stretch your arms and touch a wall on either side!! But I will say it is very cute and it has a lovely balcony as well which when the sun is out would be really nice. So I am glad I have been able to see where my little sister now lives and can safely say it is not a crack house !!

Right back to the trip. Matt and I caught the Eurostar this morning and I have to say I was really impressed with it all. Train was comfortable seats big and nice smooth uneventful ride was perfect to be honest. We are staying in the Radisson right off the grande place and it is amazing ! 5 star hotel amzing room lovely design and completely worth the trip for if anything oh yeah obvious to see Alex is worth it as well!!

So yeah will be doing all the tourist things tomorrow and then Matt is taking me for a nice belated birthday dinner and then back to normal life.
Can't wait for tomorrow plan on making myself ill off waffles !!!!
Oh yeah in case you are wondering to yourself ' why is Louisa on a weekend break and blogging ?!?!' well Alex is making us dinner so just relaxing after a days traveling and looking forward to the steak for dinner !!
have a great weekend all !!
xx

Nothing better then Speaking to Your Parents

You know when I was a kid I would sort of dread speaking to my parents for fear of them finding out what terrible evil thing I had done as a kid or a teenager. They seemed to have this way of knowing without me even speaking and damn that scared the shit out of me! And it was my mum who seemed to be the best at it.

There was one area where we seemed to out smart the old parent firm. Alex and I were brutal to a then little George ( not so little now at about 6"5 ) We did horrible things to him like duct taped him to a pole in out basement stuffed a sock in his mouth and proceeded to write, with permanent pen mind you, idiot but spelt ediot !! ha ha left him there for a few good hours. We used to sit on him tickle him till he pissed himself !! You know we always managed to blame these things on George and we got away with it 90% of the time. Then he got big beat the crap out of me one day never picked on him again. Even stranger now he has kinda taken the place of Dad and become slightly protective of his big sisters awwwwww!

Anyway back to Mum She has only gotten better at it since my Dad died 7 years ago. It was like she sapped up all his super human lie detecting skills to double her super parenting skills. Truly scary when you think about it. Unlike a lot of kids myself, Alex my sister and George my brother generally were not able to play one parent off the other they were intertwined and knew when the kids were working them. I mean we had friends who would call our dad sergeant scary ok ! How bad is that !! And our mum had these super human strengths of knowing exactly what we were up to or worse to get it out of us. They played kid off kid, which proved highly effective.

When I moved to the UK 4 years ago I thought I would be out of this super human mum radar and be safe .....How wrong was I ! My mum can still phone me have a conversation then ask me if the place is clean?? I lie say yep sure is mum spotless. And that would be my fatal error using the word spotless cause she so knew that would defy all laws on earth for me to be spotless. SO then I will break down and say yes will clean it up not dirty just untidy that's all. What makes it worse is that I will start cleaning whilst on the phone with her still !!!!!!!!!!!!! As if she will ever know I did half way across the world !!!!! So this has gone on for the first 3 1/2 years when my mum calls ... But something has changed lately

My mum speaks to me differently now like well like I am a adult that can hold a half decent conversation. I no longer annoy her anymore I think plus she genuinely seems truly happy to speak to me !! Now please do not get me wrong my mum is a super star and yes I do know she loves her ' blossom' as she calls me but I also know that I have been the bane of my mothers existence for the last decade or so and only recently have I realized what a pain in the ass I was.

I love calling my mum now you know. Seriously for some reason always have a stupid grin on my face after and well the evening always goes well too after a chat with her. But hey she still has a go such as ' stop spending money ?' ' remember you owe me money ?' ( by the way what kid does not owe their parent money I ask ?? ) ' still smoking ?? You do know it is killing you ??'
Basically the usual things. But not nearly as bad as it once was which is kinda nice to be honest.

So there you go there is nothing better then speaking to your parents. They make you think and reevaluate things in your life. They manage to cheer you up and at the same time knock your cocky ass back on the ground which I think everyone most definitely needs once and a while

Yep I went mushy on you all today sorry have to be mushy and sentimental on the odd occasion has to be done !

Home

Home. Home is most definitely Canada for me. Recently I have been inundated with questions regarding my home. The biggest ones are what are you doing here in the UK ? And Will you ever go back to Canada and where would you live?
So I have to say it has been on my mind a lot of late.
Why do I stay here ?? Not sure to be honest something about it pulls me in. I love the lifestyle and the fashion. I however do not like the cost of living and sometimes the restrictions as well. By that I mean the cost of the living adds a massive amount of restrictions on what you can do in the sense that you are limited financial. However there are so many more things to do here in the cities then back in Canada. Things like Museums are generally free which is wicked as far as I am concerned. Also as much as the British complain about the bad public transportation it is amazing in comparison!! Never understood why they complain about it all makes no sense at all.

Things that kinda suck are the the kids over here. The are rude badly brought up, lack morals and ethics, they are lazy, and most of all they are thugs and bullies. I would never in my wildest dreams allow any child of mine to be brought up over here or to be educated over here as there seems to be some serious things lacking such as simple discipline. The government well it kinda sucks but what makes it worse is the fact that at present there is no creditable option to lean towards. They seem to have neglected the health care system and have forgotten the basic needs of ordinary people and are more concerned with their inside conflicts and bickering.

But right now I still like living here if I am honest.

Canada hmm. What can I say it is magnificent and beautiful. There are lovely people and cultures over there and they are generally embraced whole heartedly by other Canadians. Do not get me wrong there are still the same issues over there as there are here about refugees and people seeming to think that all people different are spongers and evil.

It is clean !!!! Oh sweet lord it is clean over there and I miss that. I also miss winter never thought the day would come when I would say I miss winter ! What I miss about it is that feeling on a Sunday morning when you lie in bed ake up and look out the window to -30 and winter wonderland. Where the window is frozen shut and there are ice crystals everywhere and it is bright white. And all you do is snuggle that little bit further down into the covers enjoy the warmth and stay there. It is something everyone needs to experience once in their life.
I miss my family a lot as well. It is not so much the physical people but the feeling you get from having them about even when you are arguing. It is just nice to have that support network about you when ever you want. I think a lot of people tend to foget that unlike them I am here alone so when things go wrong I am not able to just pop over to my mum's and bash it out. If I want a day with my family I do not get it. So unlike others most nights I go home and well that's it me and the cat.

Would I ever go back?? A year ago I said no would never go back to Canada , 6 motnhs ago I also said nope never going back. Now yes I can safely say my mind has changed and eventually I want to go back. There are so many reasons.
First the cost of living and lifestyle is better by far and completely proven now as well the best place to live in the world is Canada more specifically Vancouver which is where I would want to move back to. The job prospects are better the houses are bigger classier and lets face it a damn site bloody cheaper then the shit over here in the UK !!! Only in the UK would you have a room called a box room !!!!! ( Canadian translation : fucking tiny guys )

The food is better as well as in more fresh fruit and veg and cheaper better quality. But the biggest thing is Canada I believe or at least certain parts of it are on a major up turn and boom and so completely worth it! So yeah I will eventually move back to the mother land and live there for my own sanity. When?? Not a clue at all!! Need to pay my car off firstly ha ha !!

I am turning into a old lady ...... And Kinda like it !!

Last night I was in a long text discussion with the lovely Sarah. The premise of the entire conversation ( if you can call texting a conversation not sure on that on?? ) was who was the older acting lady.
While she was telling me she was already in bed ( 6:30 !!) in her warmest cloths tucked up. I was telling her I was curled up on the couch in PJ's heating on full blast considering just going to bed .
She one upped me then with the fact that she was eating a chocolate mint orange and watching .....Wait for it ...... Bill Oddy's wildlife adventures !!!! oh my god that is such a OAP thing to do !
But I do believe I beat her as I advised her I was on the couch watching eastenders with not 1 but 2!!! hotwater bottles on me plus I was eating digestive hmmmm

So anyway I have decided that maybe getting old is not a bad thing. Maybe being able to curl up on your bed or couch and do fuck all when ever you wish is pretty damn cool.
And anyone who slates hot water bottles is missing out big time. They are great and not just for old people either it has to be said. It is like heaven in a little rubber bottle hmmmm want a hot water bottle now .....hmmmmm

Plus there are hidden benefits to being old as well I think. You can slag of just about every young person out there and people let you !!! Because you are old !!! You get to ride the bus for free as well. Although I find that slightly amusing cause buses are not the easiest things to get on and when you are 85 and have had 2 hip replacements you really would not want to get on would you lets be honest !?
You get lower council tax !! And you get assitance with your utility bills.
So basically I have decided screw being young I want to be a crazy OAP and live the high life !!!

So as you may be able to tell I have completely resigned to getting old and I am now in fact embracing it and well god damn cannot come quick enough.
All I need to do now is convince Sarah some how that she will not die a old crazy spinster lady and even if she is a spinster she can come live with me and we can be crazy OAP's together like bonny and Clyde ( but not so gangster like )
Believe my new mission in life is to get people to embrace getting old to be OAP's even in their 20's and 30's

( so not going to succeed in this mission am I ? )

Happy Birthday to me Happy Birthday to meeeee!!!!!.....

Unless you are a fool and can't read ( and if you can't why the hell are you attempting to read my blog ?! ) it is my Birthday well sort of as my Birthday was yesterday.
I am officially the bad side of my 20's ! I am 27 three years off 30 oh my god !! A slightly terrifying prospect!
I had a good birthday though it has to be said. On Saturday I went out with Sarah who is fast becoming best friend for me as she is so damn cool and lovely and has the biggest heart out there. Anyway we had a proper girls day. Went shopping to the Mecca known as primark hmmmm I love primark so so much. Went book shopping and then had a fab lunch at a super nice place in West Disdsbury. Then we went back to our places and had a lovely mid afternoon kip and then once rejuvenate went to get our hair done! Was the perfect pre Birthday day out. On my actual Birthday I was a little more relaxed just chilled at home basically . I did go to the gym and had a mega session of cardio which yes I realize is odd to do on your Birthday but I loved it. Then went and shopped a load more !!! I finally bought a pair of trainers I have envied fro sometime and got them in a massively good sale
reduced from £65.00 to £16.99 !Yeses you can pick your jaw off the floor it is really I did get them at thebargainin price stated and I have just attempted to put a pic on here to show you what they look like but it is not playing nice today ( computer by the way ) and not working. So if you go on the skecheAmericanan website and look under sneakers for women they are called antic and they are black and white. loveoe my trainers hmmmm
Also treated myself to a new hand bag which is lovely as well. So yep basically I treated myself on actually birthday. Then met up with the lovely Sarah again and had the mosdivinene Sunday roast dinner hmmm Lamb hmmmmm
so that was my Birthday weekend.
I got some lovely gifts well. My mum sent me £40 which I will expand on later as to what I spent that on. Matt got me the full set of the lacoste Pink perfume which was lovely plus a new scarf glove hat set all in black with a really long scarf which was perfect. He has another gift but I do not get that until we go to Brussels to see Alex in 2 weeks. Plus he winotnto give me decent hints and Alex knows whatit is and won't spill either grrrrrr!
Matt's parents were extra lovely and gave me a £20 gift voucher for Boots otherwise known as heaven to me Spent the £20 plus another £10 but was so well worth every suingle penny over spent
And Sarah helped pay for my hair cut with was so nice na dthe perfect gift and I enjoyed it as well with her as she got hers done at the same time. So all in all perfect Birthday by a mile

Right I have been off sick for a week and this is my first day back into human society and adult human conversation ( hard when it is me I know ! ) I had the awful aweful evil cold last week. I mean evil ! I had no voice for 5 of the 7 days and when I did attempt to speak I sounded evil. tracey at work decided I sounded like Patty and Selma off the Simpsons and even though I threatened to killer her for this comparison deep down I knew she was bang on. Event he damn cat hid as the sound that came out of my mouth was terrifying to him and was not his mummy ha !
Right now back to the £40 that my mum sent me for Birthday. I bought a slow cookerYes!!! yes I know this is odd and strange but I love it! I can cook all sorts in it. Seriously I have not stopped since I gHavet. have chili chilli a stew and soup and today it is currently cooking back Mediterraneaneranian chickenIhmmm. i am hoping the novelty wears off soon as I am ever increasingly running out of room in my tiny little freezer!!
right leaving it at that for now

I am far to Envious of others it is not Healthy !!

I have recently come to the conclusion that I have a major fault ( yes yes one of many whatever ! ) I am a far to envious person. I do not just envy the good looking people and the lucky but I envy things like nice houses nice cars in fact nice damned lives !!

This envy initially started when I lived by myself for the first time in the UK 2 years ago now. Before that I shared in various houses and a few really nice houses at that ! Anyway I moved into this flat in Whalley Range where I was likely the only white girl due to the fact that it was smack dab in the middle of the Afro Caribbean area. Plus you could not miss me for my sticker onto he back of my bright green Clio which read ' Canadian girls kick ass!' and yes the sticker is still there. Strangely no one has ever challenged me as of yet but I do get sheer amusement as I watch the builders in their white vans in the morning reading the sticker through my rear view mirror !! Right sorry digressing a little back to the envy. Anyway was well chuffed with myself and my first ' by myself flat' reminded me of Bridget Jones but not so sad. I was in new home bliss for exactly 24 hours and that was it. I then realized when they said unfurnished they bloody well meant it. There was nothing in this place seriously no cooker no washer no curtain into he shower for gods sakes there were no plugs nor a fridge ( had to put my pint bottle of milk on the first day in a sink of cold water !!! ) I slowly began to envy every person I saw even ones I did not know. I was thinking things like ' yeah smile away you air head just because you have a fridge makes you no better then my you bimbo !!'
What made this worse was the fact that I had just left my job as well so I was skint I mean so so poor so it took me ages to get myself sorted and even then it was not great. I had a stella beer fridge for a fridge and I never actaulyl got a cooker whilst I lived there you know ! I found amazing things to do with the free microwave that was given to me. So yes I was a envious cow all the time constantly and never endingly!
I eventually moved out of this shit hole and around the corner to a rung up the ladder of shit holes and I was in heaven it had everything even a bloody couchand plugs !!!!! I have been enchanted for some unknown reason by my little flat for the last year but horribly the envy is creeping back and the enchantment is wearing off rapidly. It has bad windows and horrible green carpet with a matching sofa. The walls have damp and the floor is uneven. I am making the envy worse lately by looking what is being advertised to rent out there right now and god dammit life sucks cause those lovely flats round the corner from me are just the same inside damned lovely !!!! But they are also 450 pounds a month over 100 pounds more then what I currently pay. It is not fair at all!!
So now I look at my flat and think can I make this look better more modern and have come to the conclusion it is not humanly possibly to!!!

other things I am envious of : people with amazing groups of friends
people with cars that never seem to get dirty
people with well behaved pets who everyone coos and ooos over not like my bastard cat who everyone calls unbalanced.
People who always have perfect hair !!!! How is that possible ?!?!
people who say things like ' never had a single problem with my teeth ' I think you will in a minute if you keep rubbing it !
People who have lovely smelling houses always . I try this but for some reason it never has that smell of perfection ever and the more I try the more I get high off the amount of air fresheners I use at once ( note : do not mix and pine smells with berry smells so does not work at all )
People that manage to get others to turn heads when they walk down the street . I believe that they are actually robots sending out subliminal messages to stare !
People with narrow feet ! You lucky bastards !!! I so cannot wear all those lovely strappy shoes due to my duck like feet !!!
People who own their own house in the UK that are my age . Considering the average house now costs £150,000 how the hell are you doing this are you pimping yourself out to pay the mortgage!!!!

So yes everyone I am envious of just about everything I guess and you know what ??Soso what I can if I want to dammit !!

THANK YOU !!

Thank you to the man at the Tescos at 6 am for telling me I had toilet paper on my shoe!!!!
Thank you to the women at asda petrol station at 6:3- this mornign for telling me I had actually put my shirt on inside out !!! Thanks for that you evil cow!!
thanks to the work colleague for informing me this morning that my fly was undone and I was flashing my orange and white tropical palm printed le senza underwear at him ( I so know he saw it !!! ) bastard !!
thanks to my landlord for telling me that the shit he destroyed in my bedroom by his own sheer stupidity by flooding the flat above me !!! And then telling me he can only offer me 200 pound of insurance money as he needs to 'cover his cost as well' thanks you fucker !! Don't worry I will cover my costs by not paying my rent see how ya like that !!!
Thanks to the inbred illierate bastard at asda behind the till who refuses to admit the charged me double for everything and then grunts at me that I need to go to the customer service desk to get it sorted even though he believes there is nothing wrong with what he did ?!?! yep that is why you work at asda you muppet !!!

as you may be able to tell I am in a slightly and somewhat aggressive mood today and well I am letting it out!! Plus it is Friday and my theory is that the world rights itself every Friday and goes tits up every Monday! So it seems appropriate to let it all out to vent it before the weekend starts.
so yes thank you to all the assholes out there who brighten my life on a daily bastard basis and enriching it with your intelligent wit and humor !!! Yeah right !

Beds, They are great you know

I love my bed !! In fact I sometimes believe that I possibly lust after my bed. I know this may sound odd or possibly strange but it is true!! I get into work and all I can think about is my bed, I get in the car and all I can think about is how nice it would be to be in my bed. For gods sakes I sit on the couch and think damn I want to be in my bed ( at 5 in the afternoon !! )

So I started to think am I the only one like this and realized that I am not alone that others are like me. That others have their beds on their brains for at least half the day if not more. You think about it a bed is a lust and life long commitment all in one. I mean we dress it in pretty cloths and some people insist on adorning it with those stupid fluffy animals as though they think it makes it look sweet ( it does not can I say it makes it look like a psycho sleeps there men see this and run remember this girls THEY RUN AT THE SIGHT OF STUFFED ANIMALS ON BEDS !!!! ) We spend made amounts of money on our beds like we would with someone we love and cherish. So yes I also and inclined to believe some treat a bed as one of the family.

I have also come to understand that my cat ( cleo ) is in love or lusting after the bed as well. I know for a fact tha the sleeps on that bed all day and does not move what so ever. I know this due to the cemented in cat sized dent on the duvet and the extrodinarly warm patch he has been slumbering on for the last 8 hours non stop. It is funny when I get home he reminds me of myself when I was a kid. When we cam home from school we wre meant to do our chores then our homework and then look after the animals but instead we vegged in front of the TV! Like any normal kid of course! Anyway we would hear that front door open or that car pull into the drive and we would do the mad dash to hide the fact that in fact we were not following the rules and we were being bad kids ! Well the cat does this mad dash from the door as if to say 'nope I was not on the bed all day in fact I was bouncing about killing all bugs in sight mum' but sometimes he is in such a deep sleep on his bed that he only manages to lift his head of said duvet look at me as if to say ' come on I am a cat what the hell do you bloody expect of me ?!?!?!'
So yes the cat also I believe has bed lust as well.

There is nothing better then crawling into bed in the middle of winter with a hot water bottle a good book and clean sheets. I have to say that I would almost call it a hobby. I prepare myself for these nights like you would stretch for the gym. I have a meal that is what you would call a comfort meal like soup or roast chicken. Then I have a bath with my book ( yeah ok and a fag as well ! ) make a cup of tea get in fresh jammies and presto I am ready for the big event!! Getting into my bed hmmmmm
So yes as stated beds are great ! As stated yes I love and lust my bed !
hmmmm bed .............

The weekend and then random stuff

Hello All
Yep it is Monday, Yes I so wish it was Friday better yet I wish it was actually Saturday but because I cannot alter time with my supper powers it is still Monday !!
I had a weekend down in London and had a great time. Went to a Australian Rules Football match and god I loved it. I have also realized that I love violence in sport as well! My god they play rough and I have to say I so cheered them on like a mad women. There was a number of full on brawls on of which was right infront of us. You knew you were in a stadium that had 17000 people in it and half were Aussies if not more and all you here is punch him you mongrel bastard!! Pure bloody class loved every minute of it ! So yes that is what I did this weekend and loved it.


It is thanksgiving weekend in Canada this past weekend. I fully admit that I got a little homesick for it all if I am honest. I miss that smell of my mum's holiday cooking. Turkey and roast potatoes and she also said she was making her legendary leek potato and bacon pie. When she mentioned this on the phone I then became even more homesick and a little tear may possibly have appeared in my eye at the thought of it all. I think I also though miss the company more then the food. All the regulars who come round for these occasions always around 2 - 3 pm all baring booze and sweets as gifts. Uncle Murray normally brings the best stuff in the booze area, normally champagne and aunty Sandy normally brings the yummy desserts. So yes I did get homesick for it all.


Recently I have thought more and more what it would be like if I did move back home. Things like would I regret leaving here? Would I get a decent job? Would I find a nice place to live? Would I even like it ? I have got as far as asking myself the questions and then never actually thinking of the answers. I am fairly sure that I only think of this when I speak to my Mum or brother and it only is a fleeting or passing thought. I still enjoy living here and have a great life and friends so no point right now is there ?



I was watching the news this morning and was completely and utterly shocked and disgusted when a report came on about a man brutalized by the New Orleans police department. This just concretes my line of thought that the vast majority of not only the public but the people in positions of powers are no more intelligent then a chicken. The fact that a human being can do that to another is one thing but the fact that a human being which is a police officer who knows he is on camera and continues to do it is a completely different thing!! The sheer stupidity and inbredness of some of the American population is proven in this video clip. The narrow minded people that get into positions like police officers and politicians is also proven in this video clip. But what gets my goat the most is the fact that at the end of the day America is a democracy and they voted this administration and this government in and so they have only themselves to blame. By voting these people in again these problems seem to get worse and more and more swept under the rug. No doubt in 48 hours time that mans beating for being drunk and ok possibly abusive will no longer be a issue there will be a new issue for people to latch on to for another few days.

Work, life more dating stuff and so on and so forth

Yes I realize I have been very quiet of late. It has been part laziness and part not been in the mood and a lot of things to mull over about as well.

Lots of things have been going down at work which I cannot fully discuss over my blog due to the nature of it but it is not great and has made me re think my position as well. I do love my job and on a whole I enjoy the people I work for as well there are the odd ones that grate on me just as I am sure I grate on them. But yeah I do love my job and I am losing some sleep over the goings on of recent events. When I am able to I will obviously elaborate on this all for you.

On a life front well hmmmmm ... Yeah not a whole lot has gone on actually !!!! I have been living a hermit's life ..... And freakin loving it! Love going home closing the door and that's it no one to bother me no phone ringing no attitude coped off at me by others ( aside from the cat will expand on this in a minute ) just me !! My space no one else and it is bloody great.

The cat ! Well the cat has now got a some what diva like approach to life now which disturbs me on many levels. You may be asking how can a cat a boy cat at that have a diva like approach to life ???? Well he does ! You must remember this is the gender confused cat so his start in life was mixed up anyway. His Diva behavior is as follows: he now refuses to eat out of is dish unless it is completely full to the brim. He then refuses to eat past the half way mark of the bowl which means I cannot remember the last time I actually saw the bottom of the bowl let alone the bowl empty. That is not normal people!! I tried the tough love approach by refusing to place anymore food in the bowl until he had eaten what was in there ( which was the equivalent of 2 meals worth) HE REFUSED TO EAT IT !!!!! he wandered round the flat for 2 solid days crying moaning and lying on the floor playing dead whilst peaking throuh one eye to see if his mama was actually feeling sorry for him and giving in. Well I gave in , I had to give in anyone who would have heard this cat would have thought he was a seriously mistreated and abused cat !! For the record this cat lives the life of Riley ok no abuse what so ever.
Second Diva moment was when I went to bed and the cat actually threw a complete fit because I had removed the pillow that was at the end of the bed that he was sleeping on. When I say fit he actually started to cry no word of a lie ! Then he went down to the pillow on the floor and rather then just giving in realizing he is only a cat after all and sleeping on it there, he got the damned thing between his teeth and attempted to carry it back on the bed ( he failed miserably ! )
so yeah I have decided that if I am not able to raise my relatively stupid feline friend to be a respectable member of society then I am certainly not cut out for raising small snotty real live children !!
Dating : As stated in previous entry I had a gather with same girlfriends of mine and we discussed dating ettiqute and rules and more have cropped up since this meeting such as:

Act your age boys this means both young and old. You do not need to act like a 14 year old boy seeing a naked women for the first time in your life but on the flip side you should not act like a 50 year old man saving his coupons for a big night out at the local Chinese !!! It is a turn off seriously it really is !
Why do guys put so much pressure on about actually having sex ???? They do you know they build it up in their minds as the encore performance to a perfect evening or date when in actual fact it could just be crap! Women tend to just think well if it happens it happens and if it doesn't well there are other means and ways to get where you want ! Ha ha so yeah guys stop it it is not a big deal stop making it out to be the end all and be all
This actually came up again it was asked of me to enforce this point out on my blog again. We do not like guys who act nervous and unconfident it makes us edgy really does! Whether it is in normal conversation in public or in the bedroom . Pretend if you don't have confidence ok ?!
And finally yes it is trued we all like nice guy a sweet guy with a personality and a sense of humor but we also like a well turned out well dressed fashionable guy. It is true most women whether it is a little bit or a lot are image conscious we cannot help this it is just that way . Do not question it
right think that's enough for one day from me as I am far to lacking in ambition today to be able to type anything remotely intelligent and thoughtful. However I will attempt thoughtful and intelligent next time promise !

Part 1 . My Mother and her Chainsaw .... Part 2 The World of Dating

Morning, Afternoon and Good evening all :)
well I had a interesting weekend it has to be said!! Will Go with part 1 first

My Mother and her Chainsaw

I called my sister yesterday to say hi and catch up. She is fine by the way still world dominating !! Anyway she said mum called her well that irritated me cause mum had not called me !?!?! Why ! grrr So I thought best give her a quick call see if she is still alive and all is well. After multiple attempts and no answer to which I kept thinking for fuck sakes it is a Sunday it is the afternoon over there what could she possibly be doing ?!?! I got my answer ! And here is the following conversation we had:

Mum: Hello ( very very out of breath )
Me: Hi Mum its Louisa

she calls me back at this point to save my mobile bill ( my mummy is lovely !! )

Me: hi mum how are you ??
Mum: ( out of breath still ?!?! ) good dear how are you everything ok ??
Me: yep all is fine and dandy mum life ticking along blah blah . ummm mum why are you out of breath what are you doing ??
Mum: OHHHH !!! I got a new toy !!!

At this point I am worried and wondering if the conversation is safe to continue ???
Me: Right ok ( confused in fact at a loss )
Mum: Do you want to hear it ????? ( she of courses sounds like a over excited kid at Christmas )

Terrified now !
Me: hmmm ok ??? What is it exactly mum ??

wait for it everyone ...........................................

Mum: A CHAINSAW !!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have a chain saw here listen

she proceeded to put the phone down and rev up her brand new chainsaw !! All I could hear was that terrifying sound of wirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I had visions of my mum in some Jason mask laughing maniacally !
needless to say I never thought 4 years after I moved over to the UK the day would come when my mother would have me listen to her new toy, a chainsaw, over the phone.
It was sureal everyone truly madly off and so my mother loved it. Seriously been giggling about it since not stopped !


The world of Dating

This weekend went and saw the 40 year old virgin with Matt and loved it seriously wicked film!! Brilliantly made laugh a minute and freakishly realistic in some ways in regards to how men think.
Anyway went out with some of my girlfriends on Sunday foir a drink and we came up with some great amazing rules for men or at least common sense things after talking bout this movie as follows:
1. As much as we say we like new age sensitive men we do not like them so sensitive we are scared of making them bloody cry. We like them to have a back bone to be assertive always
2. We like men who act their age. Oh my sweet lord why do grown men revert to 14 year old boys when around any sort of women they like possibly like or well lets face it has a pair of tits ( boys do not call them boobies !!! We call them tits so should you for gods sakes !! )
3. Men who pay always go up in out our estimations !! We actually argued over this one at first as we do believe in equality and all that but for the first while of dating we were all in agreement. We do not like being expected to Dutch everything.
4. Sex. We do not care if you are a sex god or a never had type of guy what we do care about is that fact that again you do not act like a snotty nosed 14 year old about to get layed for the first time guys !!! Come one !! We do not like it when you do everything at warp speed this includes kissing and moving your tongue around like the damned thing is on fire !! If you need help in this department ask a mate there are also books out there read up please !!!
5. But most of all the over all opinion was that we like a guy to be confident please!! Even if you are not confident pretend begging you all to pretend. It is off putting if you are a wimp

there were more rules which in the future with the permission of the other girls will be mentioned on here but they were more serious ones!!! ha ha
right bye for now ! Comment if you like !

And so it begins again .... rita is here !!

You know it amazes me everytime I turn on the TV and I see these mad crazy stupid scenes being beamed across the pond by the BBC to my little 14 inch telly! 100 mile traffic jams people running out of petrol, people looking like they are being roasted nice and golden ,like potatoes on a Sunday roast in there cars. Right Texas or at least the Gulf has known Riat was coming for a good week to 2 weeks right? No matter what this was going to be a bad one it will never end well. Rita will not decide suddenly ' hmmm giving up this hurricane shit going back to where I came from' God Dammit why do they insist on evacuating all at the same time all down the same Highway rather then doing it logically like so : non essential works ( mall workers , clothing shop workers restraunt workers ) go on the first day {( not including McDonald's as Huston is officially the fattest city in the USA and well you would have a whole lot of angry fat people if that was shut lets be honest !! ) next day semi essential people supermarkets and office workers and then finally essentials like hospitals and coast guards and what not. But no they have to do everything big ! Everyone out all at once all at the same time down the same shitty highway . Just blows my mind seriously does.
Was listening to radio one and the funniest person I have known on radio, Chris Moyles BBC 1 Breakfast show , ( listen on line if you want to hear him guys bloody brilliant ) anyway he brought up a point. Love the fact that they name these horrible evil destructive things after women ha ha !! How fitting is that really when you think about it. All the men out there who have wives named Rita and think she is a whirling dervish of a bitch this is your time for letting your anger out. Let people know that your wife named Rita is a horrible women and if they do not believe you politely inform them that she is similar if not identical to Rita the hurricane you will feel better after that promise you.
Either way though I may slag off complain bitch and moan about the way they are handling this situation over there but my thoughts and my prayers are with all of them and I can only hope that it is not going to end in the fashion of New Orleans and people come out on the bright side of this , alive.

Right enough of my moaning will stop now and let you get on with your life comment if you like good or bad is perfectly fine with me
have a good weekend all !!!

New Orleans, Would you have stayed ???? Not a chance !!

If you looked up in the sky and you saw that would you have honestly stayed to defend your propertie and worldy goods???? I have to answer from my gut and say snow balls chance in hell I would have stayed. Even if I was in a disadvantaged area with no mood of transportation I would have got my ass out of there!!

Skies are not meant to be that color thatis your first clue something very wrong is about to happen !!

My Cat was meant to be a manipulative Small Child

Hello :) All is so so in the world of Louisa. Has to be said that I am constantly tired no idea why but I could so so sleep for England right now!
Right the cat !!! Last night I am pleasantly sat/stretched on the couch last night. Meanwhile cleo/leo is madly running about my tiny flat chasing a flying bug of some sort with the full intent of catching it torturing it and then obviously eating it. Please bare in mind that my ceilings are a good 10 feet or more height and this bug is right at the ceiling. So you're now thinking the possibilities of this cat catching this thing are zero ! Wrong he gets them everything just watches and waits till it drops down and then does this Herculean leap and gets em ebverytime. So last night he was on a mission to get this bastard and he was determined to do it. He was hiding behind the couch trying the that's of it can't see me and it will drop and I will catch it sort of thing. The bug dropped down cat is behind me obviously watching this all ready to attack. The bug got smart !!!! Drops down sees cats twitching tail and body and shots up in the air. Stupid cat decides to follow it. This would have been fine except for the fact that following it consisted of leaping onto my head whilst digging his claws into my scalp !!! Stupid animal !! I shot up chasing the cat yelling ' YOU LITTLE BASTARD YOUR DEAD !!! BAD CAT BAD CAT !!' chased him into bedroom and closed door banishing him to the naughty room for a half hour. Anyone who would have heard this outside my world of the flat would have thought I was a abusive mother to a small child.
Anyway the cat was banished to the room after half and hour of kitty crying through the door. I decided he had learnt his lesson and was allowed out. As we walked back into the living room I and saying to him AS IF HE UNDERSTANDS ME !! ' what you did was very bad it hurt mummy don't do it again ! ' sat down and he joined me on his side of the couch and then he did it !! Like a small child that knows they have done wrong and the only way to make mum love you again is to pull on their heart strings and my good did he do that. He is sat there rolled over on his back with his little cat paws curled up in the air body twisted in this ungodly position looking up at me with big eyes saying ' come on lady how can you resist me you know I am cute now love me dammit !' Meanwhile I am saying to him ( out loud yep certifiable I am !! ) it is not working cleo your cute act is not working. I lasted 10 minutes and crumbled it worked and well I Loved him again.
By the way he caught that bug eventually and 2 more!! Really he is a good boy deep down !

Other then that not much else has happened. Oh have to say one thing has excited me !! I have randoms reading my blogs now !!!! Not just friends family and my work mates random people !! yep I am sad I know ! ! But it was cool to see a comment from someone I did not know someone who took the time to read what may be considered my boring random rambles about the cat purple toilet paper and other knowingly boring and strange things but have to say it validated it for me! So now I get even more excited when I see that little icon say comments and it has a number other then a 0 beside it !!!
yep sad as they can be !

The weekend is hear again yes!!!

Right I know I have been silent of late and I am so sorry for that all. It has been a made busy time and work is the main reason it has to be said. All is well though other then the fact that I am forever dreaming about cable of all things and this morning I woke up thinking I had fallen asleep at my desk !! How bad is that for Christ sakes !?!?!?!?
I have had no time for anything of late which includes cleaning. My flat currently looks like a bomb sight and I just wander rou nd it with eyes partially closed pretending it is not really that messy ha ha! Believe me it is ! Even the cat seems somewhat unhappy in it. So the mission today is to clean it and I mean clean !
It is also the last test in the ashes cricket this weekend. Have to say I am gripping the edge of my seat and actually loving it ( when it is on as it is pissing it down in London and the posh gits won't paly in a bit of rain ! ) so I am looking forward to that as well.

I am still in awe also of what is happening in the states and in New olreans I have never seen anything so despicable as that to happen in a country with satus like the US it is disturbing and a bit disheartening as well. It makes me wonder why ????? That is my one question it seems is why ??? At the same time without sounding rude or insensitive but the American public voted bush in and it is alsmot like lying in the bed you make for yourself. And even more disturbing is the fact they have another 3 years of this man as he will not just throw in the towel and give up we all know this.

Alex is doing great in Brussels and seems to love the fact that she has Multiple levels of security passes and clearances ha worl domination here she comes look out seriously !! She seems to be making friends well quickly and settled in brilliantly as well. As stated in a text ( yep she has a phone and she can text sort of still learning I think ha ) she is in a candy shop of good looking men and it is the best damned candy shop she has ever been in ha ha !!

right enough from me I need to get home and shower as just left gym and the guy beside me eating his bacon butty may be put off by the sweat ridden girl beside him ( hmmm the butty looks gooood ) and by the way yep he is gut although smells strangely of horse ?????
bye
xx

natural disasters and my sister as well

afternoon . so so sorry for all the silence this week but it has been a bit hetic and busy of late and just not had the chance. I am fine have to say was not feeling great this week plus I had my cardio tests as well on thursday. Great fun felt like a rat in a ball as it was one of those ones they make you run on a tredmill. This is fine what is not fine however is the fact that they make you do this all in a mesh faux fabric gown open in the front. No bra and cloths but did look rather fetching with my blue trainers on !! so yeah still alive and awaiting the results will let you know if die before results arrive of course.

now for alex!!! oh alex alex alex !! She missed her plane everyone !!!! ha ha ha welkl not missed the emergency exits were broken ( slightly important at 30 thousand feet in the air ) and so she was stranded. She managed to get a flight next day but i got the paniced call of ' help stranded no eurostar till next morning help !! ' there was panic and stress in that girls voice and i hate to admit it was somewhat enjoyable to listen to smart as kid ha ha !! anyway i did the sisterly thing and got her sorted. Managed to find a place for her to stay paid booked her in. Called Eurostar begged with them to transfer her ticket. They said with out a letter from airline saying her plane was cancelled they would charge her 250 pounds ( 600 bucks !! ) so managed to yell enough at the zoom people got them to fax the letter to where she was staying so she had it upon arrival. How god damned bloody good am i !?!?!?!? i am god that is what i am not nearly as useless as i thought ha ! Anywa she calls me last night at midnight sounding somewhat pissed saying i had booked her into a party centeral place it was a bar ! ha and on top of that a mixed dorm room and she was greeted by mick the aussie in his tighty whiteys!! ha she was in heaven needless to say !! so i am awaiting to hear from her. will let her tell you on her blog all about the rest i am sure there are loads of details ha !

Was watching the news about the hurricane in the states and have to say felt pity and sympathy and then anger for them all over there. I have to ask and may be wrong but if the states were not in Iraq would they have had the man power to avert the aweful things going on right now in there own land??? how can people shot rape maim and kill others in the same desperate postion as themselves just shocking and stomach turning !!